What's It With Men and Anal Sex?

What's it with men and anal sex?

No, really?

Why is it men feel the need to stick their penis in every available orifice? Right now I'm jsut waiting for some guy to say to me,

"Hey baby, let me stick it in your ear."

SMH.

My current "friend" has been on this anal sex kick for a minute now. He is determined to get in the backdoor. Now, while said friend can easily be classified as the best sex I've ever had (his oral sex game is PHENOMENAL), he has jackhammer tendencies, if you know what I mean. So anytime he mentions anal sex, all I can think is,

"OW"

So last night it comes up again. Now mind you, this is after four shots of Gentleman's Jack and one orgasm later (his not mine), and while we're in the midst of me getting my orgasm he wants to know if can just..well you know.

And I'm like,

"NO"

I don't think he liked that too much.

Besides with the nasty side effects that are associated with anal sex, I don't think it would have been a good idea last night with the loaded cheese fries and brownie sundae I had for dinner.

I'm just sayin'

Random Ridiculousness: News That Shouldn't Be But Is

Young, Rich and in Trouble
Two already privileged, way too smart white kids take their neighbors and other unsuspecting identity theft victims for a ride to a tune of a $100,000 in the last year alone. The money payed for a trip to Paris, swanky restaurants, expensive hairdos ($1,700 for hair extensions) and in the end they get busted because of a UPS package. Yeah.

Court Debates "God" on Money and in Pledge
A Sacramento atheist will appeal to a federal appeals court Tuesday to take God off of money and out of hte Pledge of Allegiance. Now i can understand the Pledge...but money...come on dude. Talk about a waste of tax-payers money.

Court Orders Mickey Nouse and Tweety Bird to the Stand
Okay so really it's a counterfeiting trial of a Chinese man whose accused of peddling fake Disney and Warner Bros. products but do to a clerical error, "cartoon characters Tweety Bird, Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and his girlfriend, Daisy," were ordered to appear in court.

A Lurid End to Fund Manager's Life
Also known as: Lifestyles of the rich, famous, and chronically coked up. Rich dude is found belly up in home pool. Squabbling begins immediately over will which says his 4 brothers get everything and wife gets nothing. Wife says, "Uh Huh. That was signed before we were married." They say "Oh no. You killed our brother by giving him coke, luring him into the pool, and promising him sex with this young guy named Tiger." LOL. I couldn't make this shit up.

Whatever Happened To...

...making out? Why is that all sexual encounters with men after puberty have to be Penis meets Vagina?

I mean what's wrong with a little, "heavy petting," as my homegirl calls it?

I said that to a guy recently, "What's wrong with making out."

His reply, "I'm a grown ass man I don't have time for making ou."

Sigh.

I mean really. Dudes act like you can't get sexual pleasure without vaginal entry. A little head, a hand job and I'm thinking it's all good. Orgasm is possible. Besides making out is an opportunity to get to know whether or not you want to "take it all the way."

Here's to bringing the bases back.

Did I Mention...

...that I came from oral sex? I never come from oral sex. Only once in the almost ten years I've been sexually active have I come from oral sex--once. And he made it happen in an afternoon. SMH.