The worst thing about stressing about The Dollars is that it stifles my creativity. Constantly worrying about finding a job, paying bills, and buying groceries ('cause right now the cupboards are empty) makes it near impossible to do much else...namely write.
I feel like if I'm not actively seeking employment (search for jobs, applying for jobs, networking, etc.) than I'm not being productive. Intellectually I realize that the other things I have to do -- my thesis, a couple of writing projects, my blog, my one "job" that I have let -- are equally as important and will probably help me with the job search, but it has been hard getting any of that done.
I am very, VERY stressed. And while I am calm and not pulling my hair out or anything, I am very uneasy about the uncertainty of not just my immediate future, but the direction of my life in general.
I started Dollars and Cents to help me work these things out. And to completely honest these blogs are the only thing keeping me from falling completely a part.
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5 comments:
I feel u JJ...I just hit up the Wank-Mart for some mint choc chip ice cream thinkin' about Blue Bell, cause that's how we do in GA, but had to settle for their brand since I needed a boost to help me edit some of this documentary video I'm working on.
Man Sabira Thafira...He(She) who endures overcomes..
In reference to your side bar comment about God...that last sentence you wrote is uncalled for and vagur.
a.f.
ohh JJ
Girl i so know where u r? A knows very well, about 2/3 months ago it was bad...not sure where my next rent money will come from.
just have to keep going girl.
One thing a friend said a while ago was that, the thing about hitting rock bottom is that, u cant sink any lower, the only way is up from there on.
true... logging at some point, can be the only thing that keeps one sane.
@ Shazza
Thanks Ma'am. I'm so down at this point I don't know what to do with myself. I waffle between having a gung-ho attitude and to feeling complete despair.
It doesn't help having my momma on my case telling me how irresponsible and how all I do is, "party all the time." Yeah okay.
But I'm trying...
@a.f.
Sorry you feel that way. I personally thought it was the best damn thing I'd read in a long time.
But I understand where u're coming from. Brown Sugar however is not for the faint of heart.
I've done the broke and in grad school thing. Use your angst to propel you to the finish line. I became unstoppable because I was on a mission to no longer be broke!!
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