Thursday, July 31, 2008

Note to the Ladies: Keep Your Panties On


Warning: This post is NOT for the faint of heart. Strong Language. NSFW.

Now anyone who has been reading this blog long enough knows that I don't have any problems with casual sex. Personally I feel if you're a grown-up and you want to do grown-up things...go for it. As long as folk are on the same page and you're being safe--no harm, no foul.

But I do have a major problem with women (and men) who are having casual sex who know good and well that that is not something they can do.

Ladies, you know wh0 you are.

You're the ones sleeping with a man, knowing good and well it was just a booty call, but get all mad when you catch feelings and he doesn't feel the same. Then you wanna complain to your girlfriends and call the poor dude everything BUT a child of God.

Whatcha complaining for? It's not his fault. You knew what the deal was before you took your panties off. You can't change the rules in the middle of the game and expect the other person is going to follow suit.

Or how about you ladies who involve yourself with a man when he has already told you he isn't looking for a relationship? But you sex him anyway 'cause you're thinking, "Girl once he gets a taste of this he's gonna forget about anyone else and settle down with me."

Newsflash: You cannot fuck a man into a relationship (well unless your name is Tameka Raymond who apparently has a mink lined coochie with 24k gold inlays). While pussy is an asset - it is one that half the population has and it's a diminishing asset at that. And you best believe if he's "not having a relationship with you," he may be "not having a relationship" with two or three other women.

I say all of this to say: if you want a relationship, then have a relationship. Stop selling yourself short with these pseudo-relationships because you're afraid that you can't get, keep or find another man.

To thine ownself be true. Stop compromising yourself and your wants by sleeping with a man in hopes that he will "wife" you. Why are you giving up all of your power? Why are you letting a man decided when, where and how you're going to be involved?

As old fashion as it may sound, sex is an easy way to eliminate the men who are really interested in you vs. those who are interested in just sexin' you. As a general rule (notice I said general) unless or until a man has shown you that a relationship is what he wants then there is no need to sleep with him. Keep your panties on. You'll save yourself a lot of heartache and pain if you just wait awhile.

Cue Janet Jackson:

17 comments:

Tonni said...

I get what you are saying and the same thing can go for the man. I was in something like that and in middle of the game he want to change the plan talking about he want to married me. I said, "Sorry, I don't marry booty calls.

Tonni

goddess said...

amen to that Sis!! alot of us dames fall victim to that mess. A dude presents a different set of emotions and feelings for you during sexcapades...don't confuse this with him 'feeling' you. It's callled being in the moment. If you want the relationship...let him take you out and get to know you first..put that pu$$y on layaway

goddess said...

P.S. Real talk...i luv your page too...i see i'm going to have to link it from mines...

Mrs. D said...

AMEN Sista. Can you say it again for the ones who still think they change his mind. This was an excellent post. Girl you said a mouth full.

mzvirgo said...

Thanks for the inspirational post. Honestly, I get tired of people looking at me funny because my legs are closed and I won't sleep with every Tom Dick and Harry out there. I know that there is a good man out there who is more interested in getting to know me other than getting the booty.

AroundHarlem.com said...

LOL @ You cannot fuck a man into a relationship (well unless your name is Tameka Raymond who apparently has a mink lined coochie with 24k gold inlays).

Jay Fingers said...

Ahaha @ your "newsflash."

I swear, if you keep giving these ladies such eye-opening insights, it's going to be harder and harder for us men to continue to take advantage!!

thelilaccarpet said...

you were right on point with that!!!

Ebony Intuition said...

so true..kudos

lala said...

You knew what the deal was before you took your panties off.

ain't that the truth!

yes said...

sounds like my cousin, but she is the one who always says "he's perfect booty call material" *rolleyes*

Angry African said...

Oh man you hit it hard with this one. So true. You can't sleep your way into a relationship. Maybe it is because we think everything should be as easy as switching on the telly with the remote. Wrong button.

Vivrant Thang said...

*pulling out my MLK church fan* You better preach! I learned this lesson the HARD way in my 20s and am so very glad I did.

It takes a WOMAN to know if you can handle that type of casual relationship. I always listen to what a man says and believe him. He will tell you by his actions, if not his words, all you need to know...if you're LISTENING.

JJ said...

@Vivrant thang:

That's all I'm saying. You know if you can hang with the casual or not. If you can't do it...just don't do it.

Chaunece said...

" you can't fuck yourself into a relationship."

damn right.

Anonymous said...

[p]Unless you can afford to purchase several [url=http://www.cchanelhandbagssale.co.uk]chanel handbags outlet[/url] of them, you need to choose a style that is practical and multi-functional . We are currently producing a wide range of women隆炉s leather handbags, many of which are designer inspired and made with the finest Italian leathers, [url=http://www.cchanelhandbagssale.co.uk]chanel handbags[/url] Visit our section on wholesale leather handbags to see our 2011 Handbags Collection . Ellie Kors might be on top prices from label at present . Additionally, for that females, this means which nobody is actually and may end up being putting on exactly the same footwear while you within the celebration . ABC Handbags,a china bag manufacturer and supplier,are currently sourcing and working with cork fabric suppliers and will definitely go into the making of these unique and chic cork-made bags and purse very [url=http://www.chanelbagsoutlett.co.uk]chanel bags uk[/url] soon . And with the summer approaching, I am in desperate need of branching out from the browns and blacks that my wardrobe seems to be filled with at the moment . Shoulder bag is the best item to show your female [url=http://www.chanelbagsoutlett.co.uk]chanel bags sale[/url] charm . The purse can be that transformation piece if there隆炉s a party you need to rush to post-work . Because they conserve, that which you conserve [url=http://www.chanelbagsoutlett.co.uk]chanel bags outlet[/url] about the footwear, a person shed about the gown.[/p][p]Botkier has been looking for his signature design which can be recognized at first sight in these years . com has got a fantastic sale on of gorgeous bags from Hobo International and don隆炉t tell everyone but they隆炉re available with more than 50 per cent off for members of our secret club . How to choose a charming and appropriate evening bag for yourself?

There are some series of new evening bags flowing . Diane Von Furstenberg Lytton Lace Clutch Bag
DVF is the shortened from Diane von Furstenberg, an America clothing brand, founded by Diane von Furstenberg . Looking the messenger bag bad or good is mainly to see its structure design, materials and workmanship . If one great idea doesn隆炉t work out, then just come up with the next one . Custom Handbags Exactly how can you understand? Perhaps you have observed the actual severe element in order to evaluate? Should sac 篓陇 main longchamp you do, a person completely would not end up being purchasing a phony soon after coping with the real point! Great steel equipment, packed delicious leather-based as well as carefully produced particulars trump the actual plastic material & vinyl fabric accessories, terribly sewn linings as well [url=http://www.chanelbagsoutlett.co.uk]chanel bags online
[/url] as knock-off logo's inexpensively glued in order to fake custom handbags as well as purses . The candy colors make the bag shining and vivid.[/p]

Anonymous said...

[p]Ralph lauren shirts,armani jeans are my summer favourite wear . 猫聛陆 Behind the scenes, a person's payment deal comes towards financial institution with an interest quote, and also stores don't do the following not having [url=http://www.ppoloralphlauren.co.uk]polo ralph lauren uk[/url] building-in an acceptable financial gain for their own end . They will make your deal with [url=http://www.ppoloralphlauren.co.uk]discount ralph lauren polo shirts[/url] appear more time and leaner . Do not buy if perhaps such the elements is provide . Aside from being comfy to wear, it is also guaranteed to keep you smart and look presentable all the time . One [url=http://www.ralphlaurenoutletonlinee.co.uk]polo ralph lauren outlet[/url] has to be very careful when shopping for clothes to polo ralph lauren uk outlet ones that suit them best . companies may choose the polo shirt for many different reasons, to increase efficiency due to its durable nature or even just for its fashionable looks . These are categorized according to age, ranging from 2 to 7 and another for eight to 28.[/p][p]Related [url=http://www.ralphlaurenoutletonlinee.co.uk]ralph lauren outlet online[/url] Articles - Polo Ralph Lauren Shirts, cheap athletic nike shoes,





Email this Article to a Friend!

Receive Articles like this one direct to your email box!Subscribe for free today! . 猫聛陆 could go because of the test, is going to suggest authorization of provincial regulators [url=http://www.ralphlaurenoutletonlinee.co.uk]ralph lauren outlet uk[/url] developed . There's [url=http://www.ralphlaurenoutletonlinee.co.uk]cheap ralph lauren polo shirts
[/url] two major traits of this alfredia louboutian casino shoe . elizabeth visits [url=http://www.ralphlaurenoutletonlinee.co.uk]ralph lauren outlet[/url] them and meets Mr . One can wear them [url=http://www.ppoloralphlauren.co.uk]ralph lauren polo shirts[/url] at casual occasions or formal events . Other features for comfort include the ribbed armbands and collar with vented hems for the ultimate convenience . I failed to see My partner and i spent Some many hours!

I'm using my personal visa bank card account in a lot of price range Simply put i saw . People of all ages are found wearing this brand of shirts in different countries.[/p]