Thursday, July 31, 2008
Note to the Ladies: Keep Your Panties On
Warning: This post is NOT for the faint of heart. Strong Language. NSFW.
Now anyone who has been reading this blog long enough knows that I don't have any problems with casual sex. Personally I feel if you're a grown-up and you want to do grown-up things...go for it. As long as folk are on the same page and you're being safe--no harm, no foul.
But I do have a major problem with women (and men) who are having casual sex who know good and well that that is not something they can do.
Ladies, you know wh0 you are.
You're the ones sleeping with a man, knowing good and well it was just a booty call, but get all mad when you catch feelings and he doesn't feel the same. Then you wanna complain to your girlfriends and call the poor dude everything BUT a child of God.
Whatcha complaining for? It's not his fault. You knew what the deal was before you took your panties off. You can't change the rules in the middle of the game and expect the other person is going to follow suit.
Or how about you ladies who involve yourself with a man when he has already told you he isn't looking for a relationship? But you sex him anyway 'cause you're thinking, "Girl once he gets a taste of this he's gonna forget about anyone else and settle down with me."
Newsflash: You cannot fuck a man into a relationship (well unless your name is Tameka Raymond who apparently has a mink lined coochie with 24k gold inlays). While pussy is an asset - it is one that half the population has and it's a diminishing asset at that. And you best believe if he's "not having a relationship with you," he may be "not having a relationship" with two or three other women.
I say all of this to say: if you want a relationship, then have a relationship. Stop selling yourself short with these pseudo-relationships because you're afraid that you can't get, keep or find another man.
To thine ownself be true. Stop compromising yourself and your wants by sleeping with a man in hopes that he will "wife" you. Why are you giving up all of your power? Why are you letting a man decided when, where and how you're going to be involved?
As old fashion as it may sound, sex is an easy way to eliminate the men who are really interested in you vs. those who are interested in just sexin' you. As a general rule (notice I said general) unless or until a man has shown you that a relationship is what he wants then there is no need to sleep with him. Keep your panties on. You'll save yourself a lot of heartache and pain if you just wait awhile.
Cue Janet Jackson: