Thursday, January 24, 2008

Blogsphere Arrogance and the my "Unconventinal Views"

It never ceases to amaze me the level of arrogance on some folks blogs. Mind you I don't mind. I can a bit arrogant myself. By nature I'm argumentative (not as much as I used to be) but it seems like my level of arrogance doesn't go over quite well.

I don't mind folk disagreeing with me. As a matter of fact I expect it. There is a reason why my blog is titled "an unconventional look at issues affecting black women."

BUT under NO circumstance will I allow anyone to talk shit to me and get a free pass. If it means I"m not "likable" well so be it. Not an issue for me. "Likable" in that context simply means "know your place" and "take my shit" and keep it steppin'.

I think I'll pass.

As far as some of my "unconventional" views:

1. I don't believe Hip-Hop is the problem. It's the result of the "problem" namely the moving of the sex industry from the fringes of society to the mainstream. You get get rid of all the nasty music and videos tomorrow and you'd still have the negative representation on women (Black women) in the media.

2. Fathers aren't that important. Yeah I said it. Women (married or not) do the heavy lifting where child rearing is concerned. Men are important in the sense that we live in a patriarchal society and they make more money and are great at being breadwinners and what not. We don't socialize men to be hands on parents and as result they don't tend to be.

3. No, kids aren't necessarily going to grow up and have "daddy issues" or need counseling cause daddy wasn't around. They might if mommy isn't around though.

4. Women can't have it all. Not at the same time at least. Stop trying. It doesn't work.

5. Women can have unattached, loveless sex with the same ease as men.

6. Black people in this country aren't doing well. As a a matter fact we're moving backward. Something has got to be done about it. Don't believe me read the Pew Research Center survey.

7. God does not want you to be single. Anyone who tells you that is a lie.

8. If Black folks would start holding White folk accountable for the way we're portrayed in the media in the same manner that we try to hold Black folk accountable we might actually get somewhere.

9. The Black Community is dead and buried.

10. White is NOT right. And Lord knows I wish more Black folk would recognize and understand this.

11. If I hear one more Black person say "I'm surviving" or "God wouldn't put more on me then I could bear," I'm going to SCREAM. Stop using God as a crutch. He helps those who helps themselves. You aren't poor, single, childless, etc. because God wants you to be.

12. People aren't poor because of a "poverty mentality" or lack of "personal responsibility." Many people are poor because of entrenched institutionalized poverty and racism.

13. You can do everything right and still not have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of.

14. Feminist isn't a dirty word (though it is a complicated one).

15. Women can raise boys just fine. They've been raising them for them centuries. I'm confused why, only now, the idea is that it can't be done.

16. I don't have much respect for Black conservatives (Republicans). I think black conservatives have got to be some of the most self hating/loathing group of people around.

17. Being gay is not a choice. You're born that way. Black folk need to stop worrying about who folk are sleeping with and mind their own damn business.

18. Being a "Strong Black Woman" is dangerous and deadly. A title used to get Black women to take on more then they can bear and not take care of their needs first. If you believe you're an SBW you need to tell that bitch to begone. Say, "Bitch. Begone." It ain't good for you and causes you to miss out on a lot.

19. For feminism (or whatever you want to call it) to work you have to accept your saints and your whores. To do otherwise is to buy into a patriarchal belief of a good girl vs. bad girl dichotomy and that doesn't do women any good.

20. Karrine Steffans, Melyssa Ford, Buffy the Body, etc. aren't an issue for me. I say do your thang ladies.

21. Kobe Bryant raped that girl.

22. Women hate each other more than men ever will.

23. Some of the "Something New" folks just want to be with White men. Just say that and stop bashing brothers. Embrace your White fantasies but you don't have to hate on brothers in the process.

24. Black women need to wake the hell up and realize that your IBM (Ideal Black Man) may not exist. Find happiness where you can. And stop apologizing for it.

25. Black men need to start holding other Black men accountable for their behaviors. It's not just "boys being boys" or "men being men." If men would speak up regarding the blatant disrespect targeting at Black women we might actually get somewhere.

26. More women need to have abortions instead of having babies. Don't get pregnant to begin with but if you do some of ya'll need to abort. Babies aren't lessons to be learned or punishments for bad behaviour. And "Thou shall not have an abortion," is no where in the bible. Aborting is better then bringing a baby into the world that you don't want or can't take care of.

So there you have it. Some of my "unconventional" views. You don't have to like them. You can vehemently disagree with me on them. I welcome the debate. But the moment you cross the line and turn it into a personal attack...well you can read LH's blog to see how well that goes...


CreoleInDC said...

I didn't read what you wrote...I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JJ! I hope this is your best year EVER!

JJ said...


Mahoganydymond said...

We have similar views. So far a have read a few of your entries. I will come back more.

JJ said...

Well Nice meeting you mahoganydymond

Glad u came to visit:-)